It wasn’t far into last night’s episode of The Celebrity Apprentice that I arrived at a conundrum: is Victoria Gotti this season’s Mama Rivers, or is she NeNe Leakes? Gotti reminds me of Rivers beyond just the frozen mask of a face, but who knew she could be as big a crybaby as the Real Housewife? Either way, do we need another [insert your pick here] this year? Not I.
Last night while announcing the second competition (creating a show for Medieval Times) to the sound of trumpets, Trump made what I marked as his first creepy comment: he pretty much volunteered Dayana Mendoza to ride nude through the streets. Classy.
Anyway, this week’s project managers were Penn Jillette and Lisa Lampanelli, whose managerial styles could not be more different. I don’t believe that the only way for a woman to succeed in a “man’s” world is to act tough. You’re telling me that successful stand-ups like Jerry Seinfeld, Ray Romano, and Chris Rock are tough as nails? You could knock them all over with a feather! I’m not sure what Lisa’s experience has been, but she’s going to be pretty unbearable if what we saw last night is what we’ll get for the rest of her time on the show.
The team’s shows themselves would have been fun to see in full. The women went with “The Unreal Housewives of Camelot,” which was cute despite how sad it is that the real series actually plays to audiences. But fighting over Sir Donald Trump? In the face of that transparent attempt to kiss up I think it’s hilarious that Trump didn’t even watch either show before the boardroom.
The men went with their talents over any real story line. Still, I thought it was pretty funny that, after Lou Ferrigno defeated Paul Teutul for the hand of Lady DeeDee, he killed himself rather than be with her.
But I figured it’d be the women who were victorious in the end. Who would have imagined that flashing skin wouldn’t equal a win? Seemed like a no-brainer at the time, although maybe not in front of the kids. I guess Lisa failed at her personal challenge to keep it a clean show.
What was up with Lou getting so upset over what Penn said? He had to pick someone! Does Lou not understand how the game works? If he’s going to be the male NeNe….
After a messier (and less enjoyable) final boardroom than usual, it was Victoria who got cut. I was pleasantly surprised there; we’ve often seen Trump hold onto train wrecks for weeks past their expiration date just because he figures they’ll bring intrigue and ratings. On the other hand, knowing he does that, if he let Victoria go maybe someone else fits that bill. Oh no, it’s Aubrey O’Day, isn’t it!
Best lines of the night: