Tara: I know you didn’t necessarily want to tackle this whole Whitney Debacle, Michael. And I don’t blame you. But the fact is, we were due for a MusiClack and I really felt like we were in a damned if you do/damned if you don’t sort of deal. So here are my thoughts:
First of all? I am sick to death of celebrities who’ve made many questionable life choices and killed themselves with drugs being deified or anglicized. While watching the Grammys last Sunday, I rolled my eyes at the constant stream of tributes by various performers. Look: I can see acknowledging her passing and having a moment of silence. But as it was? It was all too much.
I’ve also heard the unending analysis of Whitney’s life and taken a sample of comments from the women who cruise through my workplace. The consensus seems to be that Whitney Houston had a rough and troubled existence.
How so I ask you? Since when is fame and fortune and talent such a huge burden? Isn’t that really the American Dream?
It’s all about choices, Michael. Everyone has free will the last time I checked. And no. I’m faaaar from perfect. There are many things I myself am working on changing. But I saw the entire season of Being Bobby Brown. She appeared to be demanding, out of control, selfish and a bit spoiled.
Michael: I’ve never been a big Whitney Houston fan but, of course, I’ve come across her music on radio and elsewhere countless times. With her self-titled debut Whitney Houston in the ’80s, I’d have had to taken up residence beneath a rock if I didn’t know about it … and just about everything that came afterward in her career. It seems like she’s been in the news the better part of her life and now, most tragically, at the worst possible time.
Tara: Uh huh. And recent news is that the flags in New Jersey will be flown at half staff on Saturday, the day of her funeral. Why is this right? Was she a shining example? Did she give her life in wartime? Was she an important government official?
No. She was a singer. A talented one, whose music many people loved. But that’s all. The reaction is beyond overboard.
Basically my problem here is glorifying and excusing bad behavior from someone because of their notoriety. (See Lindsay Lohan, Michael Jackson, Alec Baldwin, Hugh Grant, Name Any Kardashian, Fill in The Freaking Blank.)
My only personal experience with Houston was in the eighties when I saw her open for Jeffrey Osborne. Everyone was milling around and not paying much attention. But I was. And I saw a shy young girl with her knees literally shaking in her high heels. She seemed humble and thanked the audience for being there.
Fame and money and prestige sucked all of that right out of her.
Michael: Fame — especially in the entertainment business — is a slippery slope. Some people can handle it, some people can’t. Drugs and alcohol have the tendency to be easy fixes and readily available balms to deal with the critical side of fame. Everyone has their weaknesses. If, in the end, these were contributing factors in Houston’s death (and is there little doubt they were?) then that’s very, very sad.
Tara: In Houston’s case I feel sorry for her daughter the most. What she had to see growing up and is experiencing now is way too much to ask of a teenager.
Goodness knows the entertainment business can be fraught with rejection and criticism, but I think Houston was on top of the world and hailed for the most part. Until she let her career slide because of her addictions. Then the press went after her.
And now? Her death has caused them to rally around her again, and build up what they helped to tear down. Rather fickle if you ask me.
Michael: It’s well documented she was on top of the world at the start of her career. Her music was highly acclaimed, she was involved in a multitude of charitable causes once her career flourished, she was much in demand for film roles and had an extremely popular persona which opened doors for her left and right both personally and professionally. But I cannot blame her completely for her addictions all by her lonesome, not being married to Bobby Brown with all the troubles he’s experienced. There was influence there, influence that may not have been unavoidable. She admitted to such in her interview with Diane Sawyer in 2002 and again during her chat with Oprah Winfrey in 2010, blaming drug use directly on her tumultuous marriage to Brown. Not even her divorce from him could quell those demons. And the sensationalism surrounding her death is a direct result of her popularity as well as her notoriety. It’s unavoidable.
I said above I’ve never been a big fan, but I do have strong convictions about the people who surrounded her and stood back and watched Houston’s very visible decline. Either no one cared, thinking she was a big girl who could take care of herself, or she wouldn’t let anyone step in to help in her times of need. Either way? Criminal.
Tara: I really don’t know who I’m irritated with. The media who was on her side at first and then vilified her only to change their minds and shout praises? Or am I irritated with the way celebrities are given passes in our country? Or am I annoyed at Whitney herself?
Maybe it’s a combo platter. Let’s see what our readers think …
Clacked by Tara Shrodes
on Feb 17, 2012 @ 18:02 EST5EDT
I think to many people are puttin the cart before the horse about what caused Whitney’s death. The one thing I’ve noticed is that there has been a LOT of misinformnation out there. One of the lamest was a long time blogger who reported that Bobby was THERE, at the Hilton, when it was widely reported, by MANY credible news sources and people actully there, that Bobby was in another state doing a show when he got the news!!!
Toxicology wont be in on this for at least 6 weeks. Yes, we know there were prescription bottles found, this doesn’t mean she took any of them. We just wont know til the report comes out.
I loved Whitney’s music. As I’ve posted elsewhere, the 1st song I ever sang at a Karaoke show was her song, “Greatest Love of All”, after I was told by the host to pick a song I knew most of the words to, and that I’d sing at top of voice in the shower…at the time that WAS the song I would do that with. I got a lot of applause and adoration. I now have several of Whitney’s songs in my karaoke repretoire.
I don’t get the whole thing about the flag. I’m guessing that Whitney was honored this way because she likely contributed in some way to the state of NJ…..but the people who are so upset that they attack others who disagree with them need to get a grip! A local DJ here was attacked for something he said about Gov. Christie’s decision. His name is Fitz, and he can be found on FB, if ya wanna take a gander.
I appreciate that the two of you did a Clack on Whitney!
Houston’s problems have been played out in the press…crap, the morning of her death, The National Inquirer had a headliner about her. But I would hope, even with all of the bad choices made, people would remember other people for their good qualities and stop the criticism of the bad choices…no one knows..no one really really knows.
But, there was another Whitney Houston which very few people realize existed…she was perhaps one of the biggest celebrities most pro-actively involved with various charities…From Apartheid, South Africa and the freedom concert for Nelson Mandela (she was the first celebrity to volunteer)…to St Judes, to Juvy Diabetes Research Center, she has a pediatrics wing named for her at a hospital in NJ…to the military..to the Police/Firefighters of 9/11…to her own Whitney Houston Foundation for Children. The list is mind boggling. But her devotion to helping other people is the key reason the governor of NJ chose to honor her with the flags at half staff.
Sometimes people can be so involved with other people they neglect their own well being.
. . . . .
The Houston you speak of, Mikki is the one I knew of primarily. The latter Houston – the troubled Houston – couldn’t but help encroach on the public’s need for sensationalism.
And you’re absolutely correct: No one really, really knows …
Well said Mikki!
Amen Mikki. Well said indeed.
There is an old adage that says “Never speak ill of the dead.” I try to follow that, just because the dead are not able to speak for themselves, repent of their actions, or make amends for anything they did.
However, I completely support Tara’s point that we need to stop hero-izing the dead as well. Perhaps we should start by not hero-izing the living. Idols are, by definition, false gods. Weak imitations that are created by our hands, fashioned by our desires, and remade in our own image. Maybe we honor the undeserving in death because we want our own weaknesses to be ignored in light of our good points.
One thing I feel I can guarantee you: if Whitney were able to speak on this page from “the other side”, she would have a completely different perspective than she had while living. But there are rarely do-overs in real life, and decisions we make today will often be the ones we wish we could change tomorrow.