Community – Crisis alert!

Well, okay. I didn’t think it could actually happen, but Community may have found a way to make me actually okay with the impending Jeff/Annie hookup. The key? Acknowledging the inherent creepiness right up front, before anything really happens. Granted, it also helps that she’s not 19 anymore and that Jeff has actually known her and been friends with her for the past two years; it makes it seem decidedly less predatory.

So as was foretold in the song, this is totally going to happen. I’m still not sure how his intensely shallow behavior is going to meld with her childishness, but now I’m actually looking forward to finding out – especially because Annie strikes me as the type of girl who would make weird changes to be more like her boyfriend. I can totally see her going all “Sandy at the end of Grease” on us, which would be hilarious.

I’m also 100% behind another couple, but only because they’re completely creepy – not in spite of it. Britta and Chang are a match made in whatever version of heaven you see after chewing a bunch of peyote buttons and eating a bag of day-old Taco Bell. Britta needs to feel that she can rebel in a way that has absolutely no impact, and Chang needs to exert his complete lack of authority.

It’s a twisted love story; not one that’s based on any actual love or sexual feelings; it’s more akin to the man who loves his wife, but finds a woman on Craigslist who’s willing to dress him up in a giant diaper and feed him from a bottle. Sometimes you have to go outside of your normal group in order to find someone who can give you what truly makes you happy. You’re not going to marry them; hell you still won’t speak to that person in public; but you’ll think of each other fondly during the cold winter nights.

It’s a creepy, disturbing pairing to be sure. Not as terrible as Chang and Shirley, but still not good. So it’s only fitting that to commemorate the beginning of this horrifying chapter in everyone’s lives, that they used what is definitely one of the creepiest songs ever made: “Hello” by Lionel Richie.

While it could be argued that there are certainly creepier, more stalk-y songs out there, there is no argument whatsoever when it comes to the video for “Hello.” If this doesn’t make you want to rock back and forth in the shower while scrubbing your body raw with a wire brush, then I just don’t even know what to say. Except I hope you don’t know where I live.

It’s funny; after watching this video, it really drives home the point that Jeff and Annie hooking up really isn’t a big deal. After all, it could be worse: He could be a teacher twice her age who takes advantage of her blindness by following her everywhere she goes and calling her late at night before quickly hanging up. But as soon as I see anyone’s head made out of clay, I’m out.

Clacked by Kona Gallagher
on Sep 29, 2011 @ 20:42 EST5EDT