The reason for the dichotomy? Romantic subplots on television are problematic things in my experience. For a variety of reasons, I’ve seen them end in disaster more often than not, which has conditioned me to want to avoid the subject altogether. When it comes up for one of my favorite shows, I can’t help but cringe.
Before we start this discussion, it’s worth noting that there are TV romances that are great. I don’t mean to say that they all fail, nor to say that some are right and some are wrong. What I’m talking about is how they work (or don’t work) for the shows themselves. Even I get a little sappy sometimes.
Some of my favorites over the years include White Collar‘s Peter and Elizabeth Burke (Tim DeKay and Tiffani Thiessen) Friday Night Lights‘ Eric and Tami Taylor (Kyle Chandler and Connie Britton), The X-Files‘ Fox Mulder and Dana Scully (David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson), and Sports Night‘s Casey McCall and Dana Whitaker (Peter Krause and Felicity Huffman). Whether an established couple or one that might yet become a couple, these duos avoid all the don’ts on the below list. And there are others. We should recognize the good before we get into the bad.
That said, it’s time to break some hearts. Here’s why I’m not in love with the idea of TV characters falling in love.
1) I’m just not that into it if the actors don’t have chemistry.
The two actors involved have to really click for me to even think about caring about a TV romance. You can tell me that Character A is Character B’s true love all you want, but if I don’t feel it myself, I’m not going to buy it. Chemistry isn’t something that can be created by adding it into the script. Kate Moreau (Alexandra Daddario) may allegedly have been the love of Neal Caffrey’s (Matt Bomer) life on White Collar, but most of their interactions left me cold. (Not to mention that we didn’t get to really meet her until just before she blew up … which was an entire season before we got to see why they ever got together at all.)
2) I’m just not that into it if we’ve just met.
If Character A meets Character B — or if the audience meets Character A — and by the end of the episode they’re in bed together, I’m not going to get excited about it. It feels like getting into bed with someone on the first date. Again, you can tell me these characters have known each other for the last two decades, but I want to see it myself, not just be told. Hawaii Five-0 did this earlier this season when it put Steve McGarrett (Alex O’Loughlin) in bed with “old friend” Catherine Rollins (Michelle Borth). And 24 did it when it paired Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) and Audrey Raines (Kim Raver). Sorry, Audrey, the show can tell me you and Jack have been in a happy relationship, but I’m not comfortable until I can see that you really do belong with the guy.
3) I’m just not that into it if the writers have dragged it on too long.
Even if a relationship is viable, writers can kill it in a hurry if they drag it out for all it’s worth. The “will they or won’t they?” question only takes you so far. Some shows string it out too far, all the while introducing other lovers that we all know won’t last, that therefore feel like a waste of time (Bones, I’m looking at you). Or they come up with roadblocks that make no sense. As much as I loved Sports Night, Dana’s “dating plan” sounded like an incredibly contrived way to keep her and Casey apart … and that’s exactly how it felt in execution.
4) I’m just not that into it if it screws up characters or plotlines along the way.
You know the story: your friend gets a new girlfriend or boyfriend, and then starts acting totally different? It happens in TV, too, and it shouldn’t. Just because characters get together, they shouldn’t stop being true to who they are. Dirty Sexy Money saw Nick George (Peter Krause)’s once-loving wife Lisa (Zoe McLellan) turn into a shrew in season two … just so Nick could realize that Karen Darling (Natalie Zea) was his true love all along. The fact that he finally did so during a plane crash seemed oddly appropriate.
5) I’m just not that into it if the show doesn’t need it.
There are times when the entire idea of romance is just not a good one. The X-Files stumbled when it felt the need to duplicate the success of the Mulder & Scully relationship by repeating the story with new partners John Doggett (Robert Patrick) and Monica Reyes (Annabeth Gish). Human Target is a great action-adventure show, and it was fine in season one with an all-male cast; season two saw the unnecessary addition of Ilsa Pucci (Indira Varma) for Chance to spend the season very obviously falling for. White Collar didn’t need to give Neal a new girlfriend, but they brought on Hilarie Burton for just that purpose. Note to writers: let’s not think of characters just as “love interests”; Let’s make them fully fledged people and then we can discuss their romantic prospects.
6) I’m just not that into it if you assume I’m into it.
There seems to be a belief that most TV shows have to have a romantic subplot, particularly to attract women in the coveted younger demographics. As a result, rare is the happily married protagonist, and more and more shows arrive with a love story already written in. I’m not thrilled with the idea of someone assuming what I like and dislike, based on my gender and/or age, mostly because the assumption is wrong. (In some cases, anyway. More on that in a moment.)
7) I’m just not that into it if you’re into it too much.
That love of love stories isn’t just a belief in the writers’ room. It’s spread to the networks, and even to the press, which hype the things up just as much as the creative teams do, if not more. For example, the press release discussing the upcoming season three of White Collar described Burton’s initial run on the show as “a sexy arc.” In press leading up to the recent return of Nikita, executive producer Craig Silverstein hyped up the tension between Nikita (Maggie Q) and Michael (Shane West). Promos for this week’s episode included a scene of the two half-naked. A recent TV Guide article mentioned the two “hot” men Nikita is now between, including a quote from Silverstein mentioning a scene in which Nikita, Michael and Owen (Devon Sawa) are in a room “and nobody has any clothes on.” Shows like White Collar and Nikita have so much more to offer, but it seems that everyone wants to focus on sex, romance, and eye candy. I think we’re missing the real point.
8) I’m just not that into it if it makes the fans act crazy.
This one is a big one. What really doesn’t sit with me is how the emphasis on TV romance has spread to the fans, and how the fans behave because of it. Some of them take it too far. (It’s worth noting, if only because it’s curious, that they tend to be young women.)
Some fans are themselves guilty of violating item #4 above. There are some who support pairings that are in direct contradiction to the shows themselves, many of them involving homosexual relationships between heterosexual male characters, some even incestuous (such as Supernatural). If you believe one heterosexual female I asked about this, the trend (known as “slash”) has something to do with how “women like cute guys having sex.” (This is another assumption I don’t subscribe to.) No offense is intended to those who like this idea, but I have to stick to item #4 up there.
Then we get into fans’ bad behavior. I’ve seen exchanges between fans of opposing pairings get ugly in a hurry, often devolving into personal insults. Some people take real offense when someone doesn’t share their love of a certain relationship, to the point of wishing them real harm in extreme cases. That seems to only happen when relationships are the subject. I’ve never seen anyone get into a Twitter feud because they didn’t like the same plot twist or dialogue as someone else.
Some fans have issues separating what they see on television from real life. While covering Nikita, I stumbled upon a group of fans who not only support the on-screen romance between Nikita and Michael, but believe that it is an indicator of an off-screen affair between actors Maggie Q and Shane West. They take tweets from/between the actors as proof of this relationship, and at one point discussed how the two should have children together. They’re not the first, either; a friend of mine who remains involved in the Battlestar Galactica fandom related her knowledge of a similar situation regarding actors Katee Sackhoff and Jamie Bamber, including fan-written fiction about their affair (never mind that Bamber is and was married). Treating the private lives of real people the same way that you’d treat fictional characters bothers me. It’s one thing to be a fan of an actor or actress, but especially if you’re a fan, it would seem prudent to remember that it’s just a TV show.
In fact, that’s a good rule of thumb to remember all the time. It’s just a TV show.
I want to make clear that, as with the TV pairings themselves, the above is by no means meant to describe all fans of TV romances. There are plenty who are sweet, civil, and respectful individuals. Chuck fans are heavily invested in the relationship between Chuck Bartowski (Zachary Levi) and Sarah Walker (Yvonne Strahovski), and in covering the show, I’ve found them to be some of the most kind, polite fans I’ve ever interacted with. What I’ve described above are the exceptions, and not the norm.
For my part, I’m not entirely against romance on TV. As I’ve said, there are pairings that do work, and that I have enjoyed. I’ll even admit to pulling for a romance that won’t and probably shouldn’t happen (that’s Teresa Colvin and Jarek Wysocki on The Chicago Code) and one that didn’t happen (that’s the “are they really going to?” moment in last week’s season finale of Law & Order: UK). And I’m okay with that. If romance is right, or it makes a show better, I’m all for it.
But for all the reasons I’ve just described above, I’ll always be apprehensive about the subject of TV romance. I don’t want to see them done badly, I don’t want them to overshadow great shows, and I certainly don’t want to see fans fight over them. I’m just not that into it.
Brittany Frederick is an award-winning entertainment journalist who fell in love with TV at the age of nine and has been in a happy relationship ever since. She can be found at multiple websites including her own DigitalAirwaves.net, is the webmistress of the fansite ChicagoCodeFan.com, and the Official President of the Human Target Fan Club.
Clacked by Guest Clacker
on Apr 13, 2011 @ 11:00 EST5EDT
Absolutely fantastic piece, Brittany – your insights are spot-on.
Thanks, Ruby! Much appreciated.
I agree that some couples just do not have chemistry or the chemistry is more sibling/buddies than romantic (what do you call a bromance between a man and a woman – sibmance/budmance?). White Collar’s Neal had no chemistry with Kate and the chemistry with Alex is more of the sibling vibe. CSI had the same thing, no chemistry between Gil/Sara and the chemistry between Gil/Catherine was more buddy than not. This was definitely a show that did not need a romantic hook up but got one. Leverage is walking a very fine line on this one. Nate and Sophie can be a times grating and then there will be an episode where you can see the chemistry. I cannot decide if it is the writers or the actors that are creating this feeling but right now I would rather they not bother until they can get it right.
The Bones see-saw has been done into the ground and if Castle keeps going it will really tick me off.
As to just meeting the character – that does not really bother me especially on a new show like H5-O since we are just meeting everyone. All adults have a past so it should not be surprising when it shows up. Now if a show that had been on for more than a season all of a sudden sprung a long term romance on me, then I might not buy into it as readily.
I’m with you on Leverage. I’m not actively rooting for or against any pairing on that show – though I think Hardison/Parker holds more of my interest than Nate/Sophie because darn it, he’s just trying so hard! I want to see how Leverage handles that little cliffhanger they left us with.
I think (and this is a pet peeve I discovered just through discussing that point with readers) my problem with things like H5O is that I want to get to know the characters in my TV relationships. Especially when they’re with characters that I like. I tend to get protective of my favorite characters, as fans do, and so it’s kind of like how I treat my friends: I don’t want them going out with someone I don’t know. The problem for poor Catherine is that she doesn’t yet have the chance for us to know her. None of her scenes have been very long and most of the time Steve is just calling her for help on a case! I can’t make up my mind about her, because she’s not really being used.
Someone else brought this up and I didn’t notice it either – that show has let Alex O’Loughlin keep his shirt on a lot more of recent too. Not that I don’t appreciate that he’s a handsome man (I have a crush), but it got kind of amusing how for awhile there he was always taking his shirt off.
Yes, great piece!!!
Thanks so much!
Brittany,
I read a post you did on Sports Night (we started stalking you here at CliqueClack after your initial email), and I loved it. I loved this post too. You are a terrific writer, and your insights are great.
Wow, did Kate leave me cold on White Collar (but I also love Elizabeth and Peter). One of the biggest problems is that Matt Bomer is gay in real life, so why can’t they just let him be gay on the show? Then at least he’d have a shot at having chemistry with someone…
Thanks for the kind words, Jen. I like being stalked! Looking forward to working with you more in the future – I’m always looking for places where I can engage in serious, mature TV discussion.
Elizabeth and Peter are so awesome it’s not even funny. I love that the show has a happy, nondysfunctional marriage between two mature adults. I’ve interviewed both Tim and Tiffani and they’ve both said it was one of the things they loved about their roles. (And they play them so well.)
As to your last point…I think it’s two-fold. I think part of it is that USA is now aware of Matt Bomer’s tremendous sex appeal with women (if they’re not, they’re stupid) so why jeopardize that by making Neal gay and therefore “unavailable” to women? And I’m not sure that TV would be ready for a gay or lesbian lead on a major show that isn’t oriented toward gays or lesbians (like “QAF” or “The L Word”). That would be a big step forward and I think people might be afraid of controversy with that. That’s a separate discussion, though.
Brittany, I want to chime in on the “great piece” chorus, it expressed exactly what a lot of us feel. It was good to see it put into words.
Regarding “White Collar” and the great relationship between Peter and Elizabeth, I sure wish they’d feature her more often. She was barely there this past season, but when she is it’s a lot of fun. She even got in on the act, so to speak, and was great so I for one would welcome her becoming a regular part of the guys’ antics.
I didn’t know Bomer was gay, but for me it’s a non-issue even if they were to make Neil gay on the show. To paraphrase what you say in a later comment, the sexual orientation of someone doesn’t matter to me unless I might find myself in a situation to be in a relationship with them. As I’ve been happily married since dinosaurs were new to this planet, nobody’s sexual orientation makes much difference to me.
Thanks, Tom!
I agree with you re: Elizabeth. I know Tiffani Thiessen was out for much of this past season due to her real-life pregnancy, too. But I am all for more of her. She and Tim DeKay work so well together.
And as you and several others have said, sexual orientation is no concern of mine, and it doesn’t impact how I appreciate a character or someone’s body of work. If Neal were gay, I’d still love him. One of my favorite characters on “Archer” is the quite obviously gay ISIS agent, Ray Gillette.
Straight or gay, I’m a firm believer in accepting and respecting characters (and actors, and writers, and anyone) for who they are, not seeing them as who we want them to be.
Honestly, didn’t know he was openly gay, though I had heard rumors. Doesn’t affect my man crush on him, though.
It does make me wonder: “What if they had cast a gay man as Superman?” I wouldn’t have had a problem (I would’ve preferred Bomer), but I would have been interested to see how people reacted to a gay man portraying such an iconic figure who’s meant to inspire the masses.
We handled a gay Gandalf with relative ease.
…and a gay Magneto, if we’re keeping track.
And oddly enough, he still managed to “attract!”
I’ve not seen specific confirmation about Bomer’s sexuality one way or the other. I know he keeps his private life very private (as he’s obviously well within his rights to do). I could have missed it, though, as it’s not something I was looking for. As I like to say, I don’t care who any famous person is dating unless it happens to be me.
I’m kind of in the middle between you and Bob. He’s right when he says Ian McKellen’s casting as Gandalf and Magneto was no problem. But as much as I hope people would not care about a gay actor playing Superman, the cynic in me says somebody would find some reason to mouth off about it. (Are we still complaining about Idris Elba being in Thor?)
I think Superman represents something very different in our country than Matgneto, just because of the whole “Midwestern values” and “Truth, Justice, and the American Way” aspect about him.
I had forgotten about the Idris Elba in Thor mini-controversy. God, people are rediculous.
And as to Bomer’s chemistry with women on White Collar, I’ve thought it’s been hit-or-miss, even with the same actress. Once I started to see some chemistry with Hilarie Burton, I thought the writing hindered that by fast-tracking them towards the end of season 2
Yeah, that was what I thought about, too. Superman, James Bond, those “iconic” roles are on a whole separate level. So I hesitate to say it’d be totally okay. I mean…I think of the backlash when Daniel Craig was cast. How much time did people spend on his hair color?
And Idris Elba can break me in two pieces so he can do whatever he wants, as far as I’m concerned.
I want to see what happens in White Collar, too. Not a fan so far, but I’m not going to give up on the show over that, so I know that in watching I’m going to have to accept it. Whatever it is.
Yeah, I completely agree with you that the country at large is not ready for such a move, but it’s painful to watch Bomer have to romance the ladies (he does fine acting, but the chemistry is lacking, even with Alex).
I love Peter and Elizabeth too. Just love them. I am so jealous that you got to interview Tim and Tiffany!!!
Jen, watch Traveler (if you can find it). Not only was it an excellent show, but Matt worked very well with the actress who was playing his girlfriend (Pascale Hutton). It was actually pretty heartbreaking. And that show also has a pre-Nikita Aaron Stanford in it, too.
Most fans who support slash pairings don’t want/expect it to actually happen on the show, unless it’s like Blaine/Kurt from Glee, which actually is happening. They just ship that kind of pairing for fanfiction. I kind of take exception to that being included in your list of “crazy” fan behavior. If it’s not your thing, fine. But calling other fans crazy for engaging in a normal fan activity is a little judgmental. And whether you like it or not, many women DO like the idea of “cute guys having sex”. Maybe you don’t which is fine, but those that do are not “crazy”. I do agree that fans fighting over ships, or taking it into real life is over the line, but not all fans who ship different pairings do that kind of thing.
Since you posted this same comment to this piece on my blog, I hope you don’t mind if I reiterate my response.
The heading was meant as more of a catch-all for my issues with fan behavior. That paragraph details that my chief objection with the slash phenomenon is that it goes against my fourth point, and fundamentally changes the character as he/she was intended (in that case, by changing the character’s sexual orientation). I’ve only seen the term used in same-sex pairings that are not canon, so I don’t think I’d include Blaine/Kurt in that argument, because it’s canon. Now, I’d have a problem with it if someone tried to make them straight. As I said in the text, no offense was intended.
I did state both at the beginning and the end of the article that the examples I was discussing were by no means indicative of all fans, all fans of a particular pairing, all fans of a particular show, et cetera – that they were specific examples I had seen of certain principles/beliefs that I didn’t agree with. Sadly, I’m hearing more and more horror stories of various fandoms the longer this article circulates. But those people are, in my experience, the minority.