Let’s just get this out of the way right here at the top of America’s Next Top Model, Cycle 16, Episode 1: This word is going to hit us over the head with a Cover Girl Concealer Stick on a regular basis. Might as well get familiar with it.
Fierce: being bold, displaying chutzpah, especially relating to fashion, clothes, hair or makeup; a term used in fashion for cool, sexy, awesome, or any other positive remark about something. It is most famously used by Christian Siriano (Project Runway winner), and Tyra Banks. (Thanks, Urban Dictionary!)
This cycle premiere starts off a little differently than previous cycles, with Miss Tyra taking a lot of solo screen time to explain that no, we won’t be seeing the usual casting show, with gawky girls showing off their runway walk in questionable beach attire and giving a lot of attitude to the judges and each other. Instead, in a move stolen right from Punk’d, the 14 finalists were originally lead to believe they had not been cast, leading to some false bravado-laden admissions of “we will persevere” and tearful quivering questioning of abilities. Fortunately, this doesn’t last long, and the hyperventilating squeals pierce the air when they are told the truth and introduced to this cycle’s model house.
Frankly, at this point in the season, I have a hard time telling these chicks apart and remembering who’s who. Maybe it’s because I’ve just been watching this show and Tyra’s self-aggrandizing antics seemingly forever, and I know that I’ll figure out names and personalities eventually; plus it’s easier to do so after Makeover Week, since a lot can change then. Like hair color; and emotional balance. There are a lot of strong personalities in this group, if the talking head clips are any indication. A blond called Alexandria seems to be this cycle’s Head Diva in Charge, showing her assertive bossy confident self right out of the box. Dominique, who has a delightful freckle-face, came across as another Bossy Broad, trying to take control as housemother of the gang in a weird segment that involved her calling a house meeting and holding a ceramic elephant. Weird.
The challenge this week is a combo, pairing a funky runway show where the girls walk a foot-wide runway over water while they are encased in a plastic bubble with a backstage photo shoot. Yes, it was as insane to watch as it sounds. Yes, there were the inevitable wipeouts, with the gerbil habitats going awry and girls trying to maintain dignity to recover. It was kind of a mash up of that show Wipeout and America’s Funniest Home Videos – Miss Tyra, you are a wacky one! The highlight for me was the ladies wearing garb from the T by Alexander Wang collection and guest judge Erin Wasson’s jewelry. I had just finished reading a great article on Mr. Wang in a current issue of New York magazine – ergo my excitement at seeing his clothes in motion. The Jays, Mr. Jay Manuel and Miss J. Alexander, are sitting ringside, sporting priceless expressions that rather sum it all up for the rest of us.
Judges panel was amusing, but I’m biased because I find panel stalwart Nigel Barker dishy and have a huge straight girl crush on Andre Leon Talley. Seriously, that man defines fierce. I want to be his gal pal, help him shop for his fabulous caftan-laden wardrobe and be a fixture at any soirée he holds in his salon. Miss Tyra’s there, natch, and is sporting a t-shirt with the aforementioned ALT’s face artistically graffiti-ed on it. I need that shirt. Like now. Groovy Erin Wasson adds a thoughtful voice to the deliberations, as the girls’ backstage photos, taken by noted photog Russell James are analyzed. At the end, Miss Tyra sees 14 beautiful girls standing before her but only holds 13 photos in her hands. The girl about to be no longer in the running to be America’s Next Top Model? A pretty, rather boring girl called Angelia, who has great hair but apparently not enough fierceness to hang around. Ciao, bella!
Next week: An exercise with the girls doing some acting and a lot of crying. Plus bees! And me hopefully figuring out who the rest of these lovelies are!
Quotes of the night:
“I have natural swag” – Alexandria
“You look like a 19-year-old boy with makeup on – but I like it!” — Tyra
Clacked by Jane Graves 
on Feb 24, 2011 @ 15:00 EST5EDT
