I apparently have a “thing” about gents called Arthur.
My first boss, a cigar-smoking curmudgeon with no verbal filter, was called Arthur.
My most-uttered quote from a movie comes from the early ‘80s classic film Arthur, although it was delivered by the sublime Sir John Gielgud: “I’ll alert the media.”
My favorite TV character on a ‘60s sitcom: Paul Lynde’s fey Uncle Arthur from Bewitched.
And last night, my cold, dark and very bored heart was warmed, albeit slightly, by an inept schemer named Arthur, who after making some serious errors in judgment, found redemption on an overly produced reality show.
This Arthur was taking up residence in the Biggest Loser doghouse, after making a move that was more strategery than strategic last week, shaking up the very close knit teams with a player swap and then not pulling his weight, literally and figuratively, during the weigh-in.
He tried to explain the methods behind his madness to his pop, Jesse, who did that nod-with-the-blank-stare I do whenever my engineer consultant husband tries to explain to me the complicated nuances of his job.
He spent time with Jillian, who pulled the “I’m not a licensed therapist/I just play one on television” card when giving him her patented brand of counseling. Their session together was capped with Arthur pushing Jill and a bunch of other people (I wasn’t really paying attention) around in the same truck he’d had such trouble moving in week one.
He was on the receiving end of a kitchen intervention from the ladies on his team, who educated him as to the evils of olive oil, took away his cheese and banished his beloved sausage and steak to the dirty magazine section of the fridge – you know, way in the back of the store behind the slightly soiled threadbare curtain.
And finally, thanks to a boneheaded strategery move by the Red Team, who won the chance to take one Black Team member’s weight out of the weigh-in equation and opted to remove smiling Irene, Arthur was able to play hero and singlehandedly save his team from the elimination room. Not surprisingly, new Red Team member Jay was sent home, because as self-proclaimed Red leader Justin put it, while they like Jay, he’s not family. Or something. If this had been a Survivor elimination, Justin would have been royally blindsided at Tribal Council. Smack. Alas …
True confession: I was more than a little bored while watching this Biggest Loser installment. Maybe it was the been-there-done-that feel of this episode. Same challenges, different day; or the flatness of the contestant’s personalities. No matter how much the producers shove down viewers’ throats that Rulon is an Olympic medalist, he’s just not that charismatic; or interesting; or provocative. And the featured players this week who did have personalities – Justin, I’m looking at you – don’t have very likeable ones.
Our product placement this week, in addition to long lingering camera looks at Brita water filters, was a sneaky one, courtesy of Subway. A friendly competition between Red Justin and Red Jen resulted in her having to bring him breakfast in bed – which, quelle surprise, was a Subway breakfast something or other. Meh.
Boredom aside, I will have to say that maybe my most favorite moment of this season, or of any recent season, now that I think about it, was the jubilant mayhem that followed when Arthur stepped on the scale for his weigh-in and that big 20-pound loss registered. The joy of his teammates for not only being saved from the task of elimination but for the success of a struggling friend was infectious. I couldn’t help but cheer (hush) when everyone stormed the scale stage to celebrate. No matter how jaded I get watching this show and its emotional machinations, it’s moments such as this that remind me why I tune in week after week.
That and to feed my slightly unhealthy crush on Bob Harper. Shhhh …
Quotes of the night:
“Have you seen the teams, by the way? It’s like the Care Bears versus an NFL football team.” – Jillian
“It’s important this week for me to keep my eyes and ears open and my mouth shut.” – Arthur.