What’s this show called … Warehouse 13?

I am not, by any definition of the phrase, a science fiction person. Most movies that people deem “musts” in a list of films to see have passed me by — I’m not sure I’ve even sat through one entire installment of Star Wars.

But there are exceptions to that “rule,” and they generally have something to do with actors. Even now I’ll watch a rerun of Quantum Leap … Scott Bakula’s awesome. And we were robbed of Journeyman; the fact that Kevin McKidd landed on his feet doesn’t salve that wound.

So when I heard that Saul Rubinek was in a new series, I didn’t care that it was science fiction. Okay, that’s a lie, but I was willing to try the pilot in spite of that. I loved him as Donny Douglas on Frasier, even while our first sighting of him — bare to the waist in a towel, I believe — was disturbing. Unfortunately, Warehouse 13 was not a pill I could swallow.

But when I recently popped the first season of Frasier into my DVD player — there are some shows I watch over and over again — I thought of giving Rubinek and his series another try.

Well, from the opening scene of last week’s episode I started to question my decision. The supernatural isn’t really for me, but tracking it down and locking it away I can handle. Magical chains and driftwood from the Titanic are a different story.

But remembering that I came for Rubinek’s Artie, I sat back to wait. So who were the new women who appeared suddenly? IMDb tells me that Leena (Genelle Williams) was in the pilot (I don’t remember her), but who is Claudia (Allison Scagliotti), and why did the team expand? Were Myka (Joanne Kelly) and Pete (Eddie McClintock) not enough to help keep the artifacts locked down?

That question brought to mind the pilot, when Myka and Pete are sightseeing in the warehouse and see all sorts of crazy stuff. It occurred to me that there’s a difference — at least as far as my viewing pleasure goes — between cool stuff that do whatever, and items imbued with magical powers. Why would the dust on Titanic driftwood induce hypothermia?

Artie’s tale of trading artifacts for people locked behind the Iron Curtain was bad Cold War fiction. Not that it couldn’t have happened, but it just didn’t work well as told. Neither did the Supernatural-esque character who captured him and wanted to kill him. I totally felt as if the guy — and his tools — came straight out of the CW series.

Speaking of character plots, Claudia’s love story (not to mention Claudia herself) was miserable. Granted I don’t know her so I’m not emotionally invested in her, but the way it was written — upon discovering that he really was a techie she embraced her hardware store friend passionately — was ridiculous. What was she added to the team for? At least Leena was unobtrusive.

H.G. Wells’ (Jaime Murray) mythology was lost on me as well, but again that doesn’t matter much when my problem was with the actress’ lack of talent and chemistry with the people around her. To make a comparison that some may get, she stuck out as badly as Elisabetta Canalis does on Leverage, and that’s not a good thing.

I learned long ago that it’s pointless to use my own distaste for science fiction as a base for not liking a show, at least in this column format. That’s my reason for not making Warehouse 13 a show I watch, but does that mean the show’s bad, or just not for me?

I get that argument. But my problem with Warehouse 13 had little to do with the supernatural this time around; I just found the story and acting lacking. Saul Rubinek, who I tuned in for, was enjoyable when he wasn’t trying to be all clandestine. But as he’s not alone, unfortunately even a halfway-decent performance from him didn’t save the show for me. I guess I’ll just go back to watching him on Frasier.

Clacked by Aryeh S.
on Sep 06, 2010 @ 12:00 EST5EDT