What’s this show called … True Blood?

In full disclosure, I saw an episode or two of True Blood back when it first premiered in 2008. Needless to say, at the time I wasn’t impressed … although that did have a lot to do with the fact that I’m not a vampire guy. I thought it only fair to forewarn you that I’d once passed on this series.

So why bother with it now? Not, as many of you may be thinking, for the opportunity to rag on the show. No, it’s actually due to True Blood’s success that I’ve returned. The fact is that I’ve read a ridiculous amount about the show since the middle of its second season, and what I’ve gleaned about it in short is that the series is as much a great drama as it is a vampire showcase. Sometimes it’s what else a show is that matters most; that’s what makes us not mind the fact that the show we like is about gymnasts, or serial killers, or drug dealers … or blood suckers.

And remember, this is based on last week’s episode; I wouldn’t have had the chance to catch last night’s in time.

I did find myself a bit lost in the whirlpool (cesspool?) that True Blood swirls around in, but I appreciated the fact that, unlike with some other shows that I’ve checked out while writing my column, I was able to hook into most, if not all, of the plots by the end of the hour. The great James Frain, here playing Franklin Mott, kidnapped Tara (Rutina Wesley) with the intention of making her his vampire bride — I loved that romantic proposal! I was surprised (impressed?) that he hadn’t taken her to the land of the eternally undead on night one.

I wasn’t quite clear on whether Bill (Stephen Moyer) was undercover … creepy lady said he was acting out of character, but King Russell (Denis O’Hare) didn’t appear to be under the illusion that Bill was on his side. Plus he went to save Sookie (Anna Paquin), who’s currently on the run with Alcide (Joe Manganiello) after some trouble with a wolf pack that hangs with the bloodsuckers.

I enjoyed Eric’s (Alexander Skarsgard) flashback to his life as a Viking prince (is he “Eric the Red?”) … if vampires murdered his family, why did he become one? To seek vengeance? How’d he guess that it would take this long, thereby necessitating him to become one of the undead? I have to say that he’s the only one on the show with the “look” of a vampire.

I was confused by Jason (Ryan Kwanten), who if I remember correctly was a sex addict who murdered someone (a vampire?) in the pilot. Now he’s trying to land a job with the sheriff’s department? Chris Bauer was one of the highlights of The Wire season 2, and I love seeing him whenever I can, but his role here as Acting Sheriff Andy was a little painful.

The best parts of the episode were Jason and Crystal (Lindsay Pulsipher) — I couldn’t stand him otherwise — and Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis), who isn’t all that interesting, but at least seemed “real.” And I suppose the coming vampire war, with its infusion of werewolf violence, will be interesting to people who go for that sort of thing.

But a lot of the rest seemed like a bad porno — not as far as nudity is concerned (I got a tame episode), but rather in that acting and writing seem secondary to visually arresting images and scenes, in this case vampire violence. Is it normal for the vampires to walk around covered in blood, like Russell, Bill, and creepy lady did? And those God-awful Southern accents? Ouch.

And in what’s sure to offend most everyone who loves the show, possibly the worst part about it was Sookie. I was disappointed to see that she was still mind reading whenever she thought it her right to invade other people’s thoughts, using that stolen knowledge for her own purposes.

But even that was overshadowed by how poor of an actress one would think Paquin to be, were this their only exposure to her. She’s not lacking in talent, although I’ve never seen The Piano so couldn’t tell you how she did in it, I’m no fan of the X-Men trilogy, and she’s the only part I didn’t like about the otherwise awesome 25th Hour. With all of that, I know this isn’t showcasing Paquin in a true light. She was just so lifeless, so un-emotive, so stiff. And telling me that she’s nominated yet again for some award or another won’t change what I perceived when witnessing her performance for myself.

There are shows that air on HBO because HBO airs excellent original programming — The Sopranos, The Wire, Big Love, Treme, Rome, Band of Brothers, Oz, Six Feet Under, Deadwood, to name a few — and there are shows that air on HBO because pay cable lets you curse, kill, and get naked. I didn’t find True Blood to be a member of the latter, purely exploitive group, but in no way is it in my mind a member of the former class of excellence. I could see getting into a bunch of the plots, but as a whole — even if I could look past the vampires — I just wasn’t impressed.

But call me when Eric kills King Russell and goes back to sleeping with that barmaid.

Clacked by Aryeh S.
on Jul 26, 2010 @ 13:00 EST5EDT