Last month I pitted famous movie cars/trucks versus their TV counterparts. It was a scintillating smack down that came down to a photo finish. When the smoke of burned rubber cleared, the big screen bounced the small screen to the curb. Well, TV demanded a rematch, and I was more than happy to oblige. The squawk box crew have been fine-tuning their machines. Not to be outdone, the film boys aren’t ready to relinquish the title of racing’s top dog. So, grab your sister/wife and a cooler of Bud Light — it’s time to hit the track.
Race #1 – Ecto-1 from Ghostbustersvs. GMC Vandura van from The A-Team
One team rid the Big Apple of slimy ghosts and ghouls. The other team rid society of those who oppressed the weak. A converted 1959 Cadillac ambulance takes on a tricked-out van driven by B.A. Baracus. Tough call.
Winner: Gotta go with the van. Ecto-1 is a greater risk to break down.
Race #2 – DeLorean from Back to the Future vs. TARDIS from Doctor Who
The ultimate movie time-machine stares down the quintessential TV time-traveling device. Crazy Doc Brown is in one corner, with suave Doc Who in the other. Technically, TARDIS isn’t a vehicle, but it is a mode of transport.
Winner: The DeLorean kicks ass, but has serious issues in olden times. Not the case with TARDIS. TV takes an early 2-0 lead.
Race #3 – 1977 Pontiac Trans Am from Smokey and the Bandit vs. “The General Lee” from Dukes of Hazzard
A Trans Am lines up beside a ’69 Dodge Charger. Let’s call this the “Bo” challenge: Bo Darville against Bo (and Luke) Duke. Nobody runs from the authorities like these felonious fellas.
Winner: The “Bandit” pulls away at the end.
Race #4 – 1969 Dodge Charger from Death Proof vs. 1973 Dodge Charger from Burn Notice
A classic battle. The murderous Stuntman Mike decides to tussle with super-spy Michael Westen. Lest we forget, Stuntman is a pussy who enjoys chasing innocent girls. Mr. Westen has balls of steel.
Winner: Westen … Michael Westen.
Race #5 – The 1958 Plymouth Fury from Christine vs. the Peterbilt 281 tanker truck from Duel
Nothin’ beats a supernatural showdown. Both these murderous machines are a bit temperamental. Cross their paths and you may end up a bloody stain on the highway. That would suck.
Winner: The truck is bigger, but “Christine” is a beast. The Plymouth triumphs in this scary sprint.
It was another tight competition, but the small screen avenges its earlier loss to big brother. Congratulations to television. Thanks for playing, race fans.
Clacked by Scott Tunstall 
on Aug 18, 2009 @ 12:00 EST5EDT
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