Diary of a Weeds Virgin – From drug trafficking to human trafficking

(Season 4, Episodes 4-6)

I guess this show still somewhat lives up to its title. Silas is growing pot, after all, and apparently the Mexicans are still smuggling weed into the U.S. through that tunnel. So… there’s that, I guess. But in this batch of episodes, Doug and Andy decide to become Coyotes, and “that tunnel” is a tunnel that runs from Mexico to the back room of a maternity store in an outlet mall. Nothing about any of this makes sense, but I think I like where it’s going.

(Season 4, Episode 4 “Three Coolers”)

So, once again I was wrong. I predicted that the Botwins would come to their senses and realize that suffocating an old woman is not exactly the most humane way to kill her. But, of course, that was faulty logic predicated on the idea that any of these people have any damn common sense. Instead, Nancy killed Bubbie with a Tempurpedic pillow. The whole thing is kind of ridiculous and annoying.

When she’s not busy murdering old ladies, Nancy is busy working for Guillermo. He has her go into the desert and pick up some drugs from the border patrol. Of course, she didn’t know that that was who she was picking up drugs from, so when the lights started flashing, I said that she and Andy had better take their clothes off real quick. That’s basically what happened. They started making out in order to explain what they were doing there in the middle of the night. The point turned out to be moot, but Nancy learned that Andy was a good kisser. I wonder if anything is going to happen between them; it’s a little incestuous, if you ask me.

Celia continues to be an ineffectual DEA agent, getting roped into singing karaoke to earn herself more time to get dirt on Guillermo, and then getting caught by Guillermo’s guys taking pictures outside of their warehouse. Luckily Nancy was making a drop-off at the time, so she’ll be able to save her. But what happens after that? The DEA is after Nancy pretty hardcore, and I don’t think she’ll take Andy’s advice and move to Mexico.

(Season 4, Episode 5 “No Man is Pudding”)

Well, the action I was hoping for happened in this episode. Not only did Andy shoot a Coyote in the knee, but Nancy got a new job, got Captain Till off of her back and figured out a way to get Doug and Celia down into her new digs permanently. All and all, it was a pretty productive episode.

I’m glad the whole DEA thing is over, but it seems like a little bit of a cop out for Nancy to just be able to go to Captain Till and say, “Hey, remember Peter?” and get him to completely back off. Nancy obviously has a way of making things work out in her favor, but that’s a little bit much.

I was really confused by the fact that Guillermo took Nancy off of traffic detail and installed her in that maternity store. She’s getting paid a crapload of money and she’s not running drugs or doing anything other than selling maternity bras to pregnant ladies. I figured that there would be money laundering involved, but instead, it turns out that Maternity World is the end of a hole that has been dug between Tijuana and California. That’s completely insane.

Nancy appears to have moved out of the drug business and moved into the human trafficking business, so it looks like Silas is going to live up to the show’s namesake. He made a grow house in Bubbie’s closet, and despite the fact that it got infested by bees, it seems as though he’s going to make a go of it. This show has changed so much in recent episodes that I honestly don’t know what to think about it right now. I’m looking forward to see where it goes, but it’s a little weird right now.

(Season 4, Episode 6 “Excellent Treasures”)

So I was right about the hole being between America and Mexico, but I was wrong about who was going to be doing the human trafficking. Apparently, whatever is going on in that hole has nothing at all to do with Nancy. In fact, the big boss man is muy pissed that she even went down the hole in the first place. Instead, it’s Andy and Doug who are going to become Coyotes. Their hook is that they’re going to become kind Coyotes, without the price-gauging and raping and whatnot. It sounds like a terrible idea, but I’m sure it will be entertaining in its failure.

Meanwhile, Nancy stupidly spends the entire episode asking about the man in the suit who she saw on the Mexico side of the hole. Her inquiries earn her a bag over the head and a ride to Tijuana in the trunk of a car. She meets the big boss man, who wants to punish her by giving her a “spanking,” but is apparently interrupted by the need to go kill someone. On her way back to the states, Nancy sees a poster for this man with the word “Presidente” on it. Awk. Ward.

I was wondering what was going to happen to Isabelle, since she and Dean stayed behind in Agrestic/Majestic and Celia moved down to the beach. Well it turns out that Isabelle has gone through puberty since we last saw her, and has rightly decided that moving to Detroit with Dean is way worse than living on the beach, even if it is with Celia. So does this mean that Dean is leaving the show too? The way they’ve been sloughing off castmembers lately, it wouldn’t surprise me at all.

Oh, and Julie Bowen is totally going to do it to Silas! Carol Vessey!

Clacked by Kona Gallagher
on Aug 12, 2009 @ 10:00 EST5EDT